We see the stereotype of gay men all around us. Men wearing colorful clothing and makeup driven by their sexual desires like animals; promiscuous and not giving a care about the consequences. For the most part, that would sum up the gay community. I suggest and challenge us as gay Christian men to redefine that stereotype that is put on gay men and the gay community. As gay men, we can become so consumed with our sexuality that it takes over our lives and ultimately ruins us as people. A successful person has balance to their life in every area. They do not have too little of one thing or too much of another thing. This is a constant evaluation of ourselves to make sure that we are balanced individuals and balanced gay Christian men. When we are out of balance, we hurt ourselves one way or another. As well as looking for a potential boyfriend/husband, make sure you are taking care of yourself when it comes to your career, your spirituality, your needs, and your interests/hobbies. It is never a bad thing to be a well rounded person.
The problem we see with the gay community as a whole is many of the gay men let their penises lead their lives. God created us with a mind and a way to reason. He also made emotions and feelings. When gay men live their lives out simply by their penises and what feels good, they are blocking out all possible thought and rationale. It does not matter if there is a possibility of me contracting HIV from this guy I am having sex with because it feels good and my penis wants it. We were created to be better humans than just horny guys having sex whenever we please.
In society, Christians have gotten a bad wrap for being hypocrites and many people have turned away from church and Christianity because of it. For example, many people do not understand why Christians can be so hateful to gay people when Jesus loves everyone and commands Christians to love one another. As gay Christian men, my hope would be that we would strive to not be hypocritical Christians. Sure, there will be times when we will mess up and make a mistake but we get back up and try again. We all are human and all are fallible. Would it not be wonderful to see all of the gay Christian men living for God so that it would cause the Christians to get their act together? Being an example for the Church on how to live? I encourage you to do everything for God with excellence. Be the best you you could ever be. It is so easy for us to compare ourselves to other people. When we do that, every time we are bound to come up short somewhere. Why put yourself down when you could be building yourself up, building others up, and making a difference in the world? God has a specific plan for each and every one of our lives. It is specifically designed for us. To look at what someone else has and envy them for that is foolish because God has a better plan that He designed for you. God’s best for someone else is not always the best for you. If you want something that you see someone else has, pray about it and God will show you if He wants you to have it or not.
Above all, be yourself. Confidence in yourself is attractive to anyone. People want to be friends with people who are confident in themselves. If you are the type of guy who likes to be more feminine and wear make-up and dresses, go right ahead if that is who you are. We should never be ashamed of who God made us to be. God does not want us to live lives of fear. He wants us to be confident because of who we are in Him and who He created us to be.